i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
