Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize