We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize