Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
i need some magic done to my vagina
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
