Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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