Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
