And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
