Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
