PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
