They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
the day after is always just damage control
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
