I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
