gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
