You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
