let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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