If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
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