i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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