Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
you made out with another girl for some wings
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
