As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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