then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
