I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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