I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She's the barista slut.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize