Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
