one might say we're banned from that church
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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