his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
no you cant smoke seaweed
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
