I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I have tasted many bathrooms
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
