those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
