So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
