was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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