I think im going to throw up on grandma
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
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