I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
