I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize