oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Randomize