a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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