people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
