I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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