No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
