scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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