Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
