nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
