i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize