**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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