i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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