It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
