Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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