Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
