Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
