i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
