Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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