Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
