my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize