I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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