Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
